When in doubt (?)
Friday, September 18, 2009 @ 1:22 AM
And sometimes, when I don't hear people tell me what to do or just a subconcious imagery of what I'm programmed to do, I just eat chocolate and watch a movie. Tell me, is that a waste of time or just a distraction? Because I doubt that I'll go about doing things I'll regret when I follow this, cause then I won't have to think much, if not at all, so I can stop reading between the fading lines for once, because then I won't see anything and that'll be like homemade music served in a piping hot cookie tray. Exactly, no i mean the feeling you get when you bake and the first time you pull out the tray from the oven and it smells so good. You can barely imagine that you made all that, but you've just spent hours kneading the dough and everything and you deserve a piece of everything. And it even smells so good, even through the sweat and your hands ache you still can't blame the double chocolate chip wonders for them cause you can't find fault over them anymore. So, that's what I thought about you coming back into my life. Oh, much ado over a cookie.So, there's no telling! =)
off to watch wizards of waverly place, the movie
off to watch VforVendetta
off to Mines
off to loving the person you are
Tell me why i'm distracted by repetition
Monday, September 14, 2009 @ 5:49 AM
I'm anxious, like if there's never gonna be enough days for me, and darn I keep feeling melancholic so maybe one of these days I'll wake up and get it out if my system, but it's not very easy waiting. I never want anyone to understand.
==============================================================
Shanan's like all mbledju udlemjb lbemujd jumbled.
==============================================================
i'm numb.
==============================================================
Shanan's like all mbledju udlemjb lbemujd jumbled.
==============================================================
i'm numb.
a sleepless frenzy you put me in
Friday, September 11, 2009 @ 10:44 AM
Thou shall not speak of things thou HAVE NO IDEA OF.
"If you don't tell lies, you never have to remember anything."
Lately, often enough, this irks me, probably more than the conventional human being. It's not like if you talk about it, soon enough you'd actually get it. You'd just tuck it away, in a mini corner of your mind, like a stagnant immovable rock and when it starts to float to the surface, you just push it down again. It won't stay down for long, but it's weighted down by lies and factual errors that you don't even care to correct. So don't cower in cowardice, because when you start to distort the truth, there's nothing worth hearing from you anymore.
=============================================================
Shanan says: "That's my philosophy."
=============================================================
It's two in the morning and I'm trying to make sense of the world which I will one day rule, ahem, if you permit me to that is, humbly I say. Yet I dunno, there's something about a VforVendetta-ish righteousness about me. I guess that's permanent (ha-ha) and that too, is the motivation for me to scream for what I believe in. =D
God, I sound like a haiku-blogger. In the very loose sense of the word... and, oh, bumped my head in an almost-blackout frenzy at school today (ouch). It bled and stuff...Basically it happened for about 5 reasons:
1. The fumes from heating chemicals
2. The curry mee and the calamari and the soup (not possible)
3. Lack of sleep
4. Improper sense of direction
5. Was channeling all my energy into observing how the crystals filter
nuh. maybe i'm just a freaky mess. haha, fat chance! =D
I'm still as perfect as ever.
peace. xoxo.
=============================================================
"If you don't tell lies, you never have to remember anything."
Lately, often enough, this irks me, probably more than the conventional human being. It's not like if you talk about it, soon enough you'd actually get it. You'd just tuck it away, in a mini corner of your mind, like a stagnant immovable rock and when it starts to float to the surface, you just push it down again. It won't stay down for long, but it's weighted down by lies and factual errors that you don't even care to correct. So don't cower in cowardice, because when you start to distort the truth, there's nothing worth hearing from you anymore.
=============================================================
Shanan says: "That's my philosophy."
=============================================================
It's two in the morning and I'm trying to make sense of the world which I will one day rule, ahem, if you permit me to that is, humbly I say. Yet I dunno, there's something about a VforVendetta-ish righteousness about me. I guess that's permanent (ha-ha) and that too, is the motivation for me to scream for what I believe in. =D
God, I sound like a haiku-blogger. In the very loose sense of the word... and, oh, bumped my head in an almost-blackout frenzy at school today (ouch). It bled and stuff...Basically it happened for about 5 reasons:
1. The fumes from heating chemicals
2. The curry mee and the calamari and the soup (not possible)
3. Lack of sleep
4. Improper sense of direction
5. Was channeling all my energy into observing how the crystals filter
nuh. maybe i'm just a freaky mess. haha, fat chance! =D
I'm still as perfect as ever.
peace. xoxo.
=============================================================
Sometimes, occasionally...
Wednesday, September 9, 2009 @ 6:36 AM
09.09.09I like listening to change, and now I just realized that you're not coming back, and it is all that it seems.
will be back, writing in pen instead of fiddling with keys. with love and i miss this blog so muj.
"And I will do a favour, the last one, when I start counting the seconds and minutes and hours, and maybe my prison will be walking through the world alone, but I never doubted you. And that is because I never will."
TO THE FUTURE! (with all VforVendetta-like enthusiasm)
Thursday, September 3, 2009 @ 6:42 AM
So I'm finally updating...First things first, I'll link everyone in time, k? =)
And well, much has been happening...In school, life and everything. So sometime I still sit and wonder but not so often nowadays cause I rarely have time for that. Maybe I'd rather lose myself in music and love and moisturizer. Tons of it, in a mishap at school.
"SO this is how life has been!"
will be back...
by me (magenta)
Saturday, July 25, 2009 @ 3:41 AM
You make me feel like walking in the storm, too far out in the dark,You are a thousand sunsets gone the shade of grey and the closing of central park.
It's ironic how you linger, barely leaving a trace of last december
Then I recall though, I've never seen you in one.
You're insisting on a gesture you have yet to leave me,
But YOU are the one who's got all the grand plans,
All the blueprints and the maps unwritten in the sand,
Instead etched in your soul.
Instead etched in your soul.
You are going, going
to a place with no more beginnings
for the world with you and me and our somedays
To a place where there's no time
to make up for the loss of it
I'd never suffer now,
but one day I will sit and ponder
but one day I will sit and ponder
sit and stare out at the clouds that leap over the sun and the same sky we're
under
Where did the end begin?
Cookie moderation (stop me from eating too much)
Tuesday, July 21, 2009 @ 6:31 AM
I hate cliches and I'm not about to write a long post with carefully veiled details about you. I'm not about to tell the world how I'm misery personified, and it's not your fault. I'm sorry, I know it's a bit too late. This time, nothing can be the same? Oh, I'm starting to sound like a Harry Potter Movie Trailer. I mean, someone STOP ME. I'm rambling again. =DOh, you know I despise it when people go on and on and on about some guy and in the end you don't figure what they are talking about and/or who the person they've been going on a ramble spree IS. Which makes all the sense in the world. And that is WHY, dear readers, on my concern for your welfare and reading pleasure, I am not going to do that. Didn't I just say, it's utterly boring?
Poetry
HE WAS JEALOUS ANNA AKHMATOVA
He was jealous, worried and tender,
Like God's sun he loved me.
He killed my white bird
to stop it singing of the past.
Coming into the room at sunset, he said:
"Love me, laugh, write poetry!"
I buried the happy bird
beyond the round well near the old alder tree.
I promised him not to cry
But my heart turned to stone,
and it seems like always, and everywhere,
I will hear its sweet voice.
i promise i'll be less melancholic next time round.